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this is so amusing

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    this is so amusing

    hey! what is your favorite amusement park ride?

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    ok this stupid thing. i was with some kid who went on this ride. he was the only one. i passed. he did not puke. now this other kid, he was with his cousin and they went on this ride and later the kid tells me what happened. his cousin drinks a strawberry float at the amusement part and 5 minutes later decides to go on this ride. the ride already reeks of puke, that ride always does, they can't clean it enough to get rid of the smell. plus you got hornets flying around cause their are sticky puddles of some unknown liquid located next to this ride. the hornets drink this liquid, then they attack you. the hornets should be a warning that this ride is bad.



    this kid is on it and of course he pukes. the problem is a ride like that will send the puke flying in a circuit, hitting just about everyone. if they start puking the circuit starts up again. you got people with puke all over their clothes and they gotta stop the ride. if this ride is at say six flaggs, they will close that ride down the rest of the day to clean and sanitize it. if this ride is located in some field and run by billy bob and his circus freaks, they will just wipe it down and get it back running in 10 minutes. never go on this ride no matter what.

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    this ride drops you from a great height. some people pass out.

    i was with some friends and was like, let's go on that. no one wanted to try it. i said it was safe, it would be fun. nope, they refused. i did not want to go on it alone but i also wanted to try it. so i was like, fuck. i will go it alone. well, i am in line and who is in front of me? a bike gang. biker gal and this big, bearded guy with that leather vest and big skull belt buckle. yea, i sit next to him. he is all smiles and looking at me and giving me the "this is gonna be fun" look. so the ride takes you way the hell up and you can see another state in the distance, it way up, then suddenly you drop. you feel like you are floating and the biker guy is going "AHHHHHHHHHHH". it was fucking great. that is why i remember it so well. the friends i am with are just watching us from the ground thinking we are all going to die.

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    the log water ride. now the line was long for this filthy ride. i say filthy cause i was looking at the water and it was murky, green and stanky. i thought i saw something swimming in the water, there were coins in there, pieces of hot dog, or it could have been penis. but we were in line so we got on. i figure as long as we don't get splashed it will be safe. we did not get splashed at all until the last big drop, then all this shit water hits you in the face, eyes and clothes. i was expecting to get pink eye after this. i had to grab some paper napkins and wash myself off in the bathroom. it was a mistake to go on this. when i was in NJ six flaggs i went on this ride, the water there was crystal clear. i just figured all of these log rides had clean water, they do not.


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    this ride was pretty fun. it did jam you a lot, you really had to hold on when this thing swung up and down. you had people looking like they were going to fall out, it is crazy.

    Click image for larger version  Name:	wood.jpg Views:	0 Size:	148.1 KB ID:	2364 alright. never go on a wooden roller coaster. they will crush your legs, back, your whole body will hurt after getting off one. stupid us went on one right after going on a metal one. the metal one was smooth and the drop was amazing. you were tucked in your seat and hardly moved. this wooden one had me bouncing into the guy next to me, bouncing into the hard, metal harness, just getting wrecked. my shoe almost fell off it was that bad. the wood can also break and we could have all gone flying through the air like that scene in Final Destination 3 (?) where the rollercoaster jumps the tracks and ends up landing in a corn field. stick to the metal ones.

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    this ride spins and goes up and down. the one we went on also stopped and then went backwards too. it was a long ride and that meant more time for people to puke. i enjoyed this ride and the kid next to me kept laughing the whole time, that was good, at least he was not retching. we liked it so much we go on it a second time. then halfway they stop it because some fat girl blew chunks. so lucky i did not get hit with any puke, she must had directed her spew into the seat to avoid sending it flying every which way. of course they had to shut it down and clean up. i later learned this was the ride that caused the most puke incidents.

    you had ferris wheels, mostly older people went on that. they prevented old people from going on the really wild rides. the line for that huge metal coaster was an hour. you don't want to be waiting in line and see the roller coaster car pull into the loading station with some un moving old guy who had a heart attack during the ride. if you were too fat to get that harness around you, off you went. they had to do that to one fat guy who could not get the harness to close. he kept saying, try again, tray again. nope, too fat. out you go.
    they had a water park, but the pee pee to water ratio was too high. lots of people got rashes after sliding down the water slides. the food was over priced. 5 bucks for some gatorade knock off. corns dogs ok. they always have corn dogs. they even had kielbasa on a stick. fried dough. the lines for the bathrooms were too long. the games were you win a highly flammable stuffed animal were rip offs.

    #2
    This ride at the long closed (1980s) Lakeside Amusement Park in Roanoke, VA was called "The Spider".
    Spidey slowly turned and wobbled but the seats also spun independently and if you leaned at the right time you could get those seats spinning really fast.
    Overall an enjoyable ride... 7/10.
     

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      #3
      you don't find many fun houses anymore. probably because of all those people who got killed in them. when i was like 6 we went into a fun house and somehow we could not find the exit, it was a maze with bars and i assume the adults just gave up trying to navigate this maze and we ended up backtracking and going out the way we came in. embarrassing. a lot of the rides were at county fairs. they had the giant yellow slide where you get into a potato sack and slide down. that was the only reasonably safe ride at county fairs, the other rides were sketchy. i do remember bees. all the fairs had little wasp or bees nests in the food stands. their were bees in all the trash cans.

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        #4
        Originally posted by Regina George View Post
        you don't find many fun houses anymore. probably because of all those people who got killed in them.
        I wonder if the same excuse will be made for when they reopen the Disney theme parks. Three weeks into the shutdown and already the wildlife has started moving in to the parks and if a few bears and gators get mistaken for animatronic replicas we could see some real carnage happening. And how will Disney handle it if it happens? I can't imagine they'll be able to beg the government to prop them up much longer.

        So yeah, those rides you've been posting may go the way of fun houses, arcades and dvd rental stores, sad to say. And they won't be the only things to do so - Marvel looks like it might have bitten the dust permanently, taking Snowflake and Safespace with it (and good fucking riddance) and now I'm hearing that the US's largest cinema chain Aunty Mabel's Cuntwash has had it's credit downgraded to CCC- after effectively kicking 26,000 workers and its CEO to the curb.

        Gonna be a long while before things bounce back from this. Thanks China. Some people are going to be wary about going out in public after the shutdown and not even the most die-hard Disney fans jonesing to get back in is going to tick the coffers back in the short to medium term. And this will present its own problems too.

        Tell me this; if you were the operator of a large amusement park and your bean counters were giving you all sorts of bad news about the mediocrity of the returns your park was bringing in, wouldn't you be looking to cut costs where you could? What do you think that's likely to do to the maintainence schedules do you think?

        It'll be a long time before I trust an amusement park ride again, likely I'll be too old to ride one when I do.

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          #5
          you are lucky to go on five rides at the six flaggs parks, the lines were always too long. they sold the vip pass allowing you to cut the line. those people were considered scum. we would see them in their vip line and everyone would start bad mouthing them. it was a cheap way for the park to make extra bucks. if you could act retarded, you would get moved to the from of the line too. thing is you don't want to be sitting in the adjacent car next to a handicapped person cause they are more likely to puke or spit.

          when we went to six flaggs the metal roller coaster wait was one hour. the other metal one was closed for repairs. we got there as soon as it opened and the first ride wait was 10 minutes, time you got off it all the lines went up to half hour to hours. so you just chose the ones you want and miss 75% of the others. they want you buying season passes and coming each day. the roller coaster is the best, everyone know that and even if you spent the whole day, you would probably only get to ride that roller coaster 3 times.

          as for marvel and et all. every bit of entertainment now has to have trans and gay characters. the last of us video game, you played a female and she was sort of gay but you did not know for sure. the last of us left behind dlc content pack showed she had a black friend before the zombie outbreak and they are attracted to each other. in the delayed sequel she has a wife, i guess, and there is no more hinting, she is a lesbian and they want you to know how inclusive they are. but the game is so good, i bet even KM would play it. now if they had made Lara Croft a lesbian, that game would have flopped when it was first released in 1996. at that time all the boys would be going, wtf i am playing a not playing a lesbian archaeologist even if she is wielding dual magnums
          but lara is still a good game, they had rape in one sequel, it was the gritty reboot. that was a great game.

          but all games where you can role play allow you to have same sex relationships now. if you are a male wizard, you can chose to enter the female or male brothel and play the sex game for extra points.

          i think fortnite has a trans character? km must know.

          btw is it legal to post a pic of a marijuna plant on a forum? asking for a friend.

          Comment


            #6
            I've never waited more than 20 minutes for an amusement park ride, but then I've never been to a US amusement park. I don't see the allure of standing in lines for hours just to have a 5 or 10 minute thrill here and there. The longest wait I ever had was for a waterslide flume up in a place called Grundies in Arsetrayya's Gold Coast as a kid. That was fun... the price of admission got you a wrist strap and as many rides as you could cram in before the time expired. Fun. A few people got sliced up pretty badly there a few months after my visit when some ratbag decided to affix some safety razors to one of the flumes. Hearing about it was my first ever indication that there were people in this world so narrowminded and mentally diseased that they thought fucking up other peoples lives was funny.

            Marvel missed the mark for its requirement for gay and trans characters. If the Snowflake and Safespace characters showed anything, it was that Marvel was capable of pissing off every demographic they could since even the LGBTQWTFOMGBBQ lobby came down on them like a ton of bricks for it. Marvel's stance of "fuck you, I'll do what I want" didn't help matters either and they might even have gotten away with that too if it hadn't have been for those meddling Spooky Wu Flu germs. The comic book business model has been on its last legs for decades, what with 95% of its artists having to employ the services of sugar mommas and trust funds to fuel a habit that can otherwise not keep a roof over their heads an now with specialty stores that dispensed their art all shuttered and the only major distributor folding its tents as well, Marvel (and DC) are dead in the water. Disney, who would otherwise have bothered to keep Marvel afloat for the dibs on intellectual property rights is looking at the debt incurred by Bob Iger's spending spree on cruise liners and Fox, the total lack of any cash flow from the theme parks (which was what was propping up pretty much everything else) and making the only decision they can. "Get off my land you mooching fucks" might not be the kindest way of describing their attitude, but that's effectively what it amounts to.

            At least gamers pushed back against the politically correct shitbaggery, and they pushed back hard. I guess unlike comics, gamers by definition are out to win.

            And yes, I believe it is perfectly legal to post pot plants on a forum... and it it's not, then...


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